Storks

[Gita]

I had this big silver canvas lying around for a number of years.
Today, I just started drawing and painting spontaneously and this is the initial result. I somehow like this rough sketchy type of look of this painting upon the silver background.
Should I make this more realistical? Add real water and reflections etc?If I do that I shall lose the silver background, of course. Not very sure what to do…
Would really love to hear some opinions in the forum. Thanks.

Details

[Bill76434]

  Very interesting Gita, is this aluminum foil?
I think it would benefit from a touch of blue around the legs, doesn't have to be reflections.
My critique would be that the composition looks a bit off, the eye goes up from the main bird and goes out of the picture.

[Gita]

Bill, this is a cotton canvas which was bought with a silver coloured Gesso on it.
I was reluctant all these days to paint on it since I wanted to make something special on it. This wonderful canvas was just standing around unused, so yest. I just gave it a go.
I understand your point about the missing focal point. Too many storks, I suppose. Actually I wanted a painting with many of them.. not sure how to get a focal point to this one. Nolan and Dennis, I need your opinion or suggestions to this please. 
Should I blur the other storks than the main two ones in front?

[njnjgirl]

I like this as is.  In my opinion the whole group is the focal point.  That being the case, I would not detract from them so leave everything as is.  Very curious as to Nolan's or Dennis's viewpoint. 

[Gita]

Thank you Mary Lou for your opinion, very much appreciated. As a homogeneous group of birds whose bodies melt into one another could be seen as one big focal point, I see your point.
In fact people who’ve seen this painting in the past days seem to like it, without knowing why One them said, it’s a different style than my other paintings, eventhough I think its very much my style. I paint birds on smaller sized paper.
The gynaecology group wants this painting converted to a wall mount and use it as a baby photo gallery. (actually I wanted to hang this in my home;-).

[njnjgirl]

Gita, that is wonderful....perfect place for your storks!

[dennis]

This is a diagonal composition and the main focus is on the nearest stork and then the eye proceeds upwards to the left. The third one and further backwards are less detailed to allow the first two to stand out. You have here the law of overlapping.  Love it 

[Gita]

Thank you Dennis! Learnt something again! I shall make the front two detailed.. 😊

[Bill76434]

Thank you Dennis, I look at it differently now 

[dennis]

Gita, just the front one (focus point) should be more detailed. 

[Gita]

Ok, Dennis! Will do that.. thank you so much for your advice. 🌺

[dennis]

 

[EmmaLee]

This is a great painting, Gita. I have seen many paintings on gold canvases, but this is the first silver one I have seen.
I also really like the sketchy look. I can definitely see why your colleagues want to hang it in the office.

[Gita]

Thank you, Emma Lee for your compliment😃

[Dali_9]

Hi Gita.  Like Bill says, I would consider adding some faint (thin) blue colour around the storks legs to give the impression of water.  I wouldn't make the painting any more realistic, rather, I would suggest leaving it as an abstract representation. 

I looked at some images of storks and concluded that your storks could have beaks that are a more lighter bright orange – that would make them really stand out.  Perhaps, also consider making their legs a little more brighter pink, and a flicks of pink on their plumage (as some storks do have this, particularly the tails). 

Regards, Trevor